Never Alone
by The Little Monster 1024
Summary: "Wherever you fly, this isn't goodbye" Rusty moves out of the condo.


**Never Alone**

* * *

 _"I'll be in every beat of your heart_ _  
When you face the unknown  
Wherever you fly  
This isn't goodbye"_

* * *

She was being ridiculous. She was well aware of it. But she couldn't help it. She spent her days being strong and hiding her emotions. But today? Today she didn't know if she could do it.

She stood in front of her mirror, smoothing her hands down her simple, green button down shirt and eyeing her jeans. She was stalling; she was doing every single thing she could to avoid stepping out into the living room and seeing the boxes stacked neatly throughout the room.

Rusty was moving out today.

She shouldn't be so upset. She really shouldn't. She'd gone through this before, when Emily and then Ricky moved out. She knew what it was like to have an empty nest.

She knew what to expect, but that didn't stop the ache in her chest that wouldn't go away.

Rusty was her _baby_. She wouldn't say that out loud, but her older children had pointed it out. Emily and Rusty had been fairly close in age, close enough, but then came Rusty years later. He _was_ her baby.

Her baby was moving out. Her nearly twenty-one year old baby was moving into an apartment with two roommates. He went to school and had a job; he could pay his own rent, could buy his own food. Her baby wasn't a baby at all.

She was proud of him. So, so proud in the man he had become. She was proud that he was able to overcome everything he'd been through. He wasn't that angry boy that had first entered her condo, but a strong, independent young man. He was kind, he was brave. Rusty was stronger than he gave himself credit for. He was smart, brilliant. He was doing exceptionally well in school, taking summer classes to possibly graduate early.

She was so, so proud of him.

But why did he have to grow up so fast?

She knew it was inevitable. She knew it was for the best, that Rusty needed to leave home and spread his wings.

That didn't mean she had to like it.

Sharon gave herself another look over in the mirror before taking a deep breath and stepping toward the door. She pulled the door open and peeked out. She saw Julio lifting a box up into his arms as Buzz grabbed the one beside him.

She figured the rest of the team was outside, all of them having volunteered to help move Rusty into his apartment.

With another deep breath and a silent prayer for strength, she stepped out of her bedroom.

* * *

"That everything, kid?" Andy asked, looking around at all of the boxes.

Rusty looked around too before nodding. "I think so, yeah. Thank you guys." He looked at the members of the team, offering them all a smile and another thanks as they began to shuffle from the room.

They all gave Sharon sympathetic smiles as they passed where she was leaning against the wall in the living room.

Provenza smiled at her, giving her a nod of encouragement. It was going to be tough, but he believed she'd be okay.

God, I hope so.

Andy gently touched her elbow gently. He'd be there, if she needed him. Sharon gave him a small smile and a nod which he returned before leaving the apartment.

Silence fell over them as Sharon's eyes scanned the room in front of her. The apartment was small for three men, but it would be an experience; it would be something he could look back on. It was something he wanted, a small apartment with roommates and cheap rent so he could save his money.

The living room was about half the size of hers with a larger couch crammed in. There was a TV on the wall and a couple recliners in the living room. There were video game consoles and empty bags of chips on the table.

Her son was moving into a bachelor pad. Oh God.

"I know it doesn't look that great," Rusty said. "but it'll work. And these guys seem cool."

Sharon forced a smile and nodded, standing up straight. "For a small apartment filled with three young men, it looks immaculate."

Rusty laughed at that. "Well, I think some of your cleaning craziness has rubbed off on me, because I, like, really want to clean this place up." He said, rubbing his arm.

He was happy and excited, she could tell that much. But he was nervous. He knew these boys enough to agree to be roommates, but he didn't really know them. They didn't know him.

Everyone worried what others thought of them to some extent, but in Rusty's case, it seemed to be a lot more. She knew it bothered him; that maybe they'd find out about his past and not want anything to do with him. It was something that she couldn't control but wished so very much that it wasn't something he had to struggle with so often.

"When will Austin and Sam be home?" She asked him.

Rusty shrugged.

"They're going to like you, Rusty." Sharon assured him. "They wouldn't have allowed you to move in with them if they didn't."

Rusty looked at her, meeting her eyes. How was it that she always knew what was bothering him. "This is a little weird, you know?"

She looked at him, waiting for him to go on.

"When I first moved in with you, I didn't even want to sleep in my room because I was sure I wouldn't be there long. And then when the letters happened, I didn't want to leave. Now…here I am."

Sharon crossed her arms. "It's what happens, Rusty. Kids can't live with their parents forever." She spoke softly. "As much as we'd like them to."

Rusty smiled a little, stepping forward and hugging her tightly. There was a time when he didn't even want Sharon to touch him. But now, hugging Sharon felt like home. He didn't know what it was to be hugged for the sole purpose of comfort and love before Sharon.

She held him close, rubbing his back. "I'm going to miss you." She felt tears gathering in her eyes, squeezing her eyes closed to hopefully keep them at bay. "The condo's going to be lonely."

"You'll have Andy." He reassured her, pulling back.

She was surprised to see tears in his eyes too. She laughed a little. "I suppose. Although, he isn't quite the cook you are."

Rusty laughed too. "I'll still come cook for you. God knows I can't trust you to cook for yourself. I'm not sure the stuff you cook is even edible."

She smacked his arm, smiling at him. "Be nice. I cooked for myself and Ricky and Emily for years."

"I know. They still tell me horror stories about it."

Sharon rolled her eyes. "You're all horrible." She shook her head at him, but couldn't wipe the smile from her face.

Rusty's phone buzzed in his pocket. He checked it, frowning a little. "They're almost home."

Sharon nodded. "I should go. Let you unpack and get acquainted on your own."

Rusty nodded too. Sharon took one last look around the living room before smiling at Rusty. She had so much she wanted to tell him.

 _Make sure you remember to pay your rent on time.  
Don't dry your black sweater or it will shrink.  
Make sure your Chinese leftovers aren't in the fridge too long.  
You can call me if you need anything.  
You can always stop by the precinct if you want to.  
You can always come home.  
For anything._

But he knew all of that.

So, she turned and made her way to the door. As she pulled it open and took a step into the hallway, she heard him calling her name.

"Sharon?"

She turned back to look at him. "Hmm?"

"I love you."

She smiled at him. "I love you too, Rusty."

* * *

 _"My love will follow you stay with you_ _  
Baby you're never alone."_

* * *

 **Thoughts?**


End file.
